So it's not quite the mood tracking I was intending, but this whole blogging thing is almost addictive in a sporadic-depending-on-mood type way.
When I'm down, I can't find any words, either in the real world, or in this virtual world, yet once I've had time to process things, or if something positive is happening, then the words don't stop buzzing around my head (like bees to honey Pooh might say). It's 11pm and I've gone to bed but have found myself back up again as there are too many thoughts going on.
Now that I'm downstairs, laptop in hand, or, in more accurately, on lap, I'm wondering what those thoughts that were so clear a mere 5 minutes ago were.
My cats are not at all impressed at having their nightly routine interrupted, and the bird isn't really sure what's going on - and although I've found out over the past two days that she likes classical music, it's quite handy she doesn't have the same affection for keys on a keyboard or she'd be chirping away!
Anyway, you guessed it, I digress!
A funny thing happened to me today. It wasn't funny in the usual sense of the word, but something happened that generated an actual unexpected laugh out loud moment for me, and it has changed the course of my day. I now have energy at 11pm - even though as I was typing that I did a massive yawn.
Because of this funny thing, I have decided something....I'm not scared. I'm not scared of what lies ahead and could well be ready to take on some of the challenges.
Of course, early days, and a long way to go, but for this girl, thinking (or feeling, or thinking then feeling) has given me some positivity and some get up and go, and, given this morning I was struggling to get up, let alone 'go' anywhere, this is a good thing.
In other news; I found Party of Five on Netflix. I don't mind admitting I adored that show when it was on in the 80's, and I'm loving practically every minute of it now.
I need to obviously be very careful to not get carried away, and the fact that I was up writing extremely late indicates that I have the potential to get extremely excited, and after excited there is the potential to get down. I may not be tracking my moods in the way I initially intended, but acknowledging the ups and downs is definitely a start!
I wish you the most awesome day, love Becs xx